


Family Planning

by Missy



Category: The Addams Family (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Confrontations, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-22
Updated: 2019-12-22
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:21:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21904384
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/pseuds/Missy
Summary: Debbie's done worse things than become an Addams...
Comments: 8
Kudos: 86
Collections: Yuletide Madness 2019





	Family Planning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [GotTheSilver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/GotTheSilver/gifts).



“Debbie,” Wednesday says, in a voice that’s flat and dares not brook an argument. “Kitchen. Now.”

“Um. Not going to be ordered around by a nine year old. Right, darling?”

Fester makes a sound that indicated agreement. Either that or his collar was too tight again. 

“Kitchen,” repeats Wednesday. Debbie shrugs. She follows the girl there, and is shocked when she removes a large manila folder from her casket-shaped backpack.

“You’ve been doing a lot of murderous things over the last few years,” said Wednesday. “Shall I start with the man whose boat you sank or the car you blew up?”

Debbie’s façade is uncracked. “Those were all accidents, and I have court injunctions to prove them.”

Wednesday shakes her head. “Wanton murder could be forgotten. But the greed? Without it, you could be one of us. Homicide? Mayhem? Those are Addams Family values,” said Wednesday. "So why not **become** a part of the family? I think there's something you could teach us - and we may teach you."

And then Debbie takes a minute to think about it.

Gomez has a line of credit and cash that seems inexhaustible. Fester has no interest in money at all. With him turning a blind eye to her, she can buy everything she's ever wanted and live a life of luxury. All she has to do is put up with Fester's existence.

Well. She has done much worse with her life than be an Addams. 

“One question. How does your family feel about pastels?”

Wednesday’s brow rise. “We can…tolerate them,” she grits out.

“All right. I’ll become a part of the family. Your auntie,” says Debbie, in a sugary voice.

And only the tiniest hint of malice enters her voice when she says it.


End file.
